8 + 13 = Kickoff
Since my last blog was pretty much and cut-and-dried tourney recap, let me spend a little time hitting on the non-show doings. First off, gotta give some major love to my fellow Insider Troxler, who beat ME back to my own house a couple of shows back to mow MY yard. Since my lawnmower, much like my cars, does have a steering wheel and four wheels, and therefore HAS to blow up, it did just that and with the grass touching the power lines, it was time to go for some outside help.After the tourney, Brass Munkey threw a very nice little homecoming party for Kamakazi Kid. Can't say enough just how great it was to have Kazi back, even for just one weekend. Word is it won't be 7 1/2 months next time which is great news for EVERYbody. Kazi just set the standard at such an insane level in so many different facets in the cruiserweight division, that even today, it seems like everyone is still living under that shadow and everything we do is judged against his actions of the past. I'm sure he'll do something at some point again that will make me go "what the hell are you thinking???" but I think he's become even smarter with his work in his absence now that he can reflect on the past few years. Going back to the party briefly, I tell ya one think, for all he has accomplished between ROH and the Inoki Dojo, it's crazy just how freakin' cool Ricky Reyes truly is. He's one of those guys that you would think would have that "I'm a superstar Indy worker" attitude, but hell, he's more humble than alot of the Indy guys we see each week.
The Observer had a mark-out news story for me the other day with "Today's Detroit News has an article that Ford Field in Detroit is trying to get Wrestlemania for Detroit in 2007, noting it would be the 20th anniversary of Wrestlemania III at the Pontiac Silverdome." That would just be awesome and I'm SO hoping it works out. I'm bigger on the Mania "big crowd" feel much more than the 20,000 seat ones and a Ford Field expanded for Mania could hold a minimum of 75,000. Plus, any homage to pro wrestling's defining night I'm ALL for (Perfect time to stick Savage and Steamer in the Hall of Fame too).
Speaking of the Hall of Fame...two of my favorite QBs of all time (along with Favre, Boomer, and Cunningham) went in together this past weekend in Canton. Young and Marino were about as different as two great QBs can be and the discussion of who was the best between the two is a tough one. I think Young may have been the best all-around QB of the two, but there's no question that Marino was the superior passer. It really is hard to believe that it's been 5 years already since these two last played. Makes me feel just that much older because the memories they left are just SO vivid. Heck, Young leading the 49ers over the Cowboys in that 3rd NFC title game is still, and always will be, my personal favorite football moment of all time. Monday Night brought us a pretty fun little Hall of Fame Game between the Fins and the Bears. Even got a Muppets open with Miss Piggy wearing a Zach Thomas jersey and the two old geezers running down the HOF class. Miami's offensive line looked horrid, especially consider that the Bears don't have the scariest defense or nothing. Very disturbing to see Moose in a Bears jersey. I don't know what John Madden was thinking, burying Manuel Wright as bad on national TV as anything I've ever heard. I mean, it's one thing to sit here and tear someone apart on a blog, but to do it when the entire country can hear it, including Wright's friends and family, is completely classless. You gotta love how if it's a player Madden likes he will go on and on about some 300+ pounder being a prime example of "how football should be played" and then turn around and tear Wright apart in his first game in his rookie year for being out of shape. Nice Madden, real nice.
Of course, Madden was good for at least one thing in his miserable life, that being a videogame that came out this week (Now that I've said that, I'd MUCH prefer say, EA Sports presents Walsh 2006 or Lombardi 2006). I won't get to play it till this weekend when I whip Yamaha's ass in it, but that is my segue to recap my newest videogame joy, "Flatout". Keep in mind that I actually don't care for videogames that much...I pretty much find one or so I genuinely love once every 5 years and play it to death (I have the feelin that I'll still be playin NFL 2K5 in 2K15). But man alive, let me tell ya that "Flatout" is one of the most addictive, perverse games I've ever gotten to play. Heck, screw the actual "game", just play the "bonus games" and shooting that helpless sap 100 years in the air and doing a demolition derby in a mud pit are both just plain addictive. Not a football to be found, but a serious **** game. Also checked out NCAA 2006 very briefly (1 half worth) and it certainly seemed acceptable although I don't really "feel it" with college football but I bet ya I'd enjoy it if I spent a little more time with it.
I become more and more disenchanted with fast food restaurants by the day. I don't know if the passing of Dave Thomas has finally caught up to Wendy's or what by my god has that franchise ever hit a downward spiral. My hamburger the other day was actually a "double hamburger" which would have been a good error if the "double" hadn't come from the fact that the patty was so burned that it had severed itself into two equal pieces of charcoal. It is NO exaggeration that drive-thrus in general will fuck SOMEthing up on an order at LEAST 50% of the time. Seriously. I mean, is the mental acumen that great of difference between the guy that takes your order INSIDE and the one that mans the drive-thru counter? I'd say McDonald's actually gets it right a good 75% of the time. Burger King is a borderline 50%. Wendy's would be lucky to hit 33% as I can't even remember the last time I ordered there and they actually got it 100% correct. And if I haven't bitched about it before, will you PLEASE stop asking me if I want cheese on a Hamburger. If I wanted cheese on a HAMburger, I'd order a fuckin' CHEESEburger. Are there actual customers that travel from drive-thru to drive-thru across the country asking for Hambugers and then bitching cause there's no cheese on them, thereby forcing the chains to add this asinine question???
Last Saturday we were back at the CSA in Burlington for a fairly unsupervised-by-the-powers-that-be TV taping that thankfully was a much bigger hit than the last one we did in May.
1. Xsiris pinned Jay Sinn in 6:40 -
What should have been a hot opener revolving around redemption (for X) and revenge (for Sinn) was overshadowed by some questionable comedy revolving around Sinn keeping Vercetti up-to-date on the action with a cell phone. All the spots were fine but the potential was wasted. *
Burlington Slugger: Brad Stutts and Mikael Yamaha attempt to interview the speechless Ultra Dragon with entertaining results, ending with Dragon stomping Yamaha's broken foot and leg lariating Stutts to set up a revenge match for later. Fun stuff.
2. American Steel Ninja (with Amber O'Neal in his corner) pinned Brandon Day in 4:16 - Day, of VA fame, makes his CSA debut as does Ninja with Amber at ringside to really get that relationship going. Your basic TV matchup. *
3. Otto Schwanz pinned Caprice "Ice" Coleman in 7:33 -
Otto makes his appearance for the foreseeable future, taking time due to wife, job, and age. A fine way to go out too as him and Caprice have a seriously solid bout. Even as a heel, crowd has MAD respect for Coleman right now due to his crispness and originality. ***
4. Ultra Dragon defeated Donnie Dollars (with Brad Stutts and Mikael Yamaha in his corner) by submission in 6:17 -
Wonderful finish to the two-part story that started earlier. Dollars of course mauls Dragon, who makes the comeback with the sky twister press, Yamaha makes the save only to get locked in the christo, crowd goes nuts, Dollars then gets locked in the christo as well and he TAPS. Major, major upset and perfectly executed on all levels to capitalize on Dragon's surprising tournament run. **1/2
5. CWF/AWA Mid-Atlantic Television champion "El Fuego" Jesse Ortega pinned Rising Generation League champion Kid Justice in 7:04 -
One of those matchups that almost gets overlooked in it's history and importance when compared to many others. Ortega's first match ever was teaming with Kid Justice, Justice pinned Ortega to win the RGL title, a rare champion vs. champion matchup, and Ortega going for his 20th successful title defense. Match seriously paid off to with some great wrestling building to an awesome false finish for Justice and a surprise pin for Ortega. Wish the crowd had been more into it as their continued shitting on Ortega is painful to watch. Still a damn good match though. ***1/4
Post-match brings out Michael McAllister who announces that he has brought in some previously "blackballed" talent to take down Commissioner Cross' golden child (Ortega). Out comes Moses Manson who cuts a fine little promo. Jesse attempts to retort but loses his mind on the mic (let's say because of all the past heat between the two), resulting in the first ever utterance of "bastard" on a live CWF microphone. He gets in Moses' face and out of nowhere gets nailed from behind by none other than the priKC himself. Moses and KC McKnight do a 2-on-1 beatdown on Jesse until CWF flagship Ric Converse makes the save and chasing Moses and KC out the front door. A fine little segment that got the home run across, although I don't think we hit quiet the home run that it could have been. When you have a situation like this, it's very difficult to portray new wrestlers as actual outsiders because that stuff has been done to death in WWE/WCW. Marks think everything's a work now and even though we have a little room to work with in the Mid-Atlantic where some fans DO still believe, it still has to be carefully handled. In a perfect world, Moses and KC should be ripping the AWA sign off the wall and pissing on it but I think that might not make the cut for TV.
6. CWF/AWA Mid-Atlantic Heavyweight champion Garry "Madd Trucker" Stevens pinned Brass Munkey in 8:54 of a Johnny Weaver Cup tournament quarterfinal match - Without any crazy overbooking, this was almost a no-win situation as truthfully, no one really expected Munkey to get past Garry here. It's really weird...the crowd seems to have little faith in Munkey UNLESS he's wrestling Corey, the one guy that realistically, he should never be able to beat. Anyways, match was fine for what it was. **
7. Rob "Boogie Woogie Man" McBride, "Rock N Roll" Matty Dee, and CWF/AWA Mid-Atlantic tag team champions $outh$ide Playas (J-Money and Will B. Smooth with Kiyia Moka in their corner) defeated Tank Lawson, "A Very Handsome Man" Mitch Conner, Alex Adonis, and Julius Augustus (with Cornelius J. Lumpkin III in their corner) in 13:21 when Dee pinned Augustus -
Not the complete cluster that it had potential to be, with well-defined team captains (Boogie, Tank) helping tell the story here. I do wish it would have had a little more pre-match direction in order to truly tell the story that needed to be told. Much like Ortega-Manson, the point got across, but not exactly a home run. **
8. "Dangerous E" Corey Edsel (with Brad Stutts in his corner) battled "Slick Diddy" Ric Converse to a 20:00 time limit draw in a Johnny Weaver Cup tournament quarterfinal match -
THE #1 all-time CWF feud renews itself, kicking off with awesome intensity with a ring-entrance brawl, the way it should be. They then settle down into a more traditional pace and go the distance, eliminating both men from the tourney. Certainly different from any of the previous matchups as time has changed many, many things about this matchup. Very good (that goes without saying), and great at points although the non-finish certainly left many let down. ****
Overall thoughts - A very enjoyable show, certainly in segments that will provide for some great TV. I just wish we could have tweaked certain things here and there but not a bad little effort at all.
Man of the House-
Ya know, this sucker was actually pretty good. Tommy Lee Jones' deadpan delivery is pretty damn funny and when you surround him with some smokin' hot cheerleaders, how can ya bitch too much? Sure, the plot is kinda out there and it's a complete waste of time, but it's an enjoyable waste of time. **3/4
Dukes of Hazzard - For the first time in YEARS (Probably since 2/19/93 and the opening of "Army of Darkness"), I actually saw a movie the day it premiered in theaters. As I've gone into detail in blogs long since past, I was a HUGE fan of the show during it's original run. But I'm also not one of those stuck up die-hards that's gonna have a cow at every minor little modernization they do with the remake. I went in pretty neutral in fact, and let me tell, people are gonna HATE this movie. Not because it sucks (which it doesn't), but because they expect more. Critics nowadays want all this story and drama and importance with nearly every single piece of work that is captured on film. Personally, I have no use for a plot getting in my way of having fun at the movies. If these same critics that will shit on this movie could remember back 20 years, they'll recall that the Dukes original TV series was totally panned by critics. But it was a success because it was FUN. And with that, the remake captures the essence of the original perfectly. It's all about FUN. The wild car cashes, the wrecks, the characters...no BS, no tears, no moral, nothing but sheer, unadulterated FUN. And really, that's what it's all about. For fans of the TV show, when the original Waylon Jennings theme hits a few minutes into the movie, you just swell with pride. It takes you back to your youth, makes you smile and in that moment, all is right with the world again. The casting is just superb with the standout almost being difficult to pick out...Burt Reynolds as Boss Hogg. Perfect. Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke. NO one could have done it better...seriously. Willie Nelson as Uncle Jesse. Slight variation on the original, but in his own scene-stealing way, perfect. Johnny Knoxville. Just awesome. Seann William Scott. Hilarious. It just goes on and on. Even by god FLASH has a cameo!!! That's 5-stars right there baby. The only casting that was done in error was Roscoe, who was made out to be an actual badass heel rather than the bumbling goof from the TV show. My only other knock on the movie was that it took me about 15 minutes in to adjust to the cussing. Not that I don't cuss constantly but if you have a history with the TV show like I do, it really throws you off for the first little bit since there was NEVER a swear word uttered back then. The movie will be lucky to gross $100 million, the critics will hate it, most viewers will hate it. But this movie wasn't made for people like that. It was made for people like me, Rob McBride, and so many others that can see past what the movie (ahem) "should be" and accept it for the fun that it is. ****
On a side note, I'm not sure how much of a craze it will truly cause since the movie is somewhat destined to flop at the box office, but good luck getting your hands on a 1969 Charger now that this movie's out. All of us left the theater DYING to own a General Lee and in my internet hop skotch that I do, I stumbled upon a wondrous website that will BUILD you your OWN General Lee (for $35K and up, but what the fuck...if I'm gonna dream, dream big). DukesofHazzardCharger.com will take care of all your 01 needs. I mean shit, I can barely afford McDonald's some days, but I'll be damned if I don't pull one of those out of my ass one day.
GRANT "STATMARK" SAWYER
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